It's been frighteningly long since I've taken the time to write, especially considering that I love doing it. I'm back! Life has changed so much since some of my last posts and in the very best ways. In June of last year, I married my dear husband. After saying "I do", we took a wonderful trip around the Pacific Northwest and then returned home to squeeze all of my belongings into his one bedroom apartment. It's exactly as you'd imagine.....the dining area turned into storage area for stacks of lovely wedding gifts and Rubbermaid containers stuffed in corners holding my clothes and one too many pairs of shoes. Nice and very cozy. Fast forward a few months. After countless open houses and rushing to see the latest listings with our realtor before a sold sign was staked in the front yard, we purchased our first home. Push the fast forward button once more, and we arrive at this summer. On June 14th, we welcomed our beautiful baby girl into the world. Nearly every parent has told us to enjoy every moment and that the years fly by. They aren't kidding. Yesterday, Elisabeth turned two months old, and we've been loving to watch her change and grow by the day. She's such a joyful baby who loves to smile and make her mom and dad smile even bigger. So that's essentially the past year or so in a really small nutshell. I don't glaze over it quickly because I take these blessings lightly nor do I want to minimize how grateful I am for each part of it. I'm well aware of so many others who are waiting, praying for, and hoping for marriage and parenthood. I always wanted to be a wife and mama when I grew up, and I know that God has been so generous to gift me with these responsibilities in life. It's just that there isn't enough room to tell you everything I'd love to share about this goodness; you'll just have to wait for future posts. It's life right now for me, so it's going to be the meat and bones that my writing is made of for quite some time. Here's a little appetizer; more to come.
Mommying, Breathing, and Such
Mommying isn't a verb. It should be. It didn't take me but about a few hours after Elisabeth's birth to quickly see that being a mother was going to be one of the hardest yet most rewarding jobs I have taken on yet in my life. It makes some of the Olympic sports look like child's play. Oh, you just competed in the pentathlon? Me too. I just finished feeding, diapering, rocking, singing, and bathing the baby. While standing on one foot. And talking baby talk. And trying to come up with something for dinner. 10.0. Moms are heroes. I now look at the moms around me everywhere I go and want to tell them, "Well done. You're rocking this. You got your kids out of bed, fed, dressed, and out the door in one piece today. And you look presentable too. You are mommying like a champ. You go girl!" Mommying is really hard work, and don't let anyone try to convince you that it's not. It's awesome work, and I wouldn't trade it for a million. So to all you moms out there who are mommying 24/7, especially those who are doing it so well by not only physically caring for their children but spiritually discipling them to follow hard after Christ as their supreme treasure as well, step up on the podium. Gold medals for you. You're my role models. Keep on keeping on ladies!
Being a mom is a huge task, but it's also been such a breath of fresh air in my life. It's probably just part of the way I'm wired, but it feels like for such a long time I've been running life at a fast tempo trying to complete countless tasks at a breakneck speed so as not to fall behind. Being at home with my sweet baby girl has totally reoriented my days in such a good way. It's taken me back to the basics. Sometimes when Patrick gets home in the evenings and asks me about what we did today, I realize it was nothing monumental or all that exciting. I tell him, "Well, we read some books, looked at some toys, did some tummy time, tried to get Elisabeth to take some good naps, and things like that. Basically the same as yesterday." Being with a baby really takes you back to the littlest of things. It slows you down in the right kind of way and makes you realize that the little things are oh so good. Today Elisabeth and I looked out the window together and I told her about rain. That it's a gift God gives us that helps things to grow. When would I have otherwise slowed down enough to think about that? Being at home is sometimes really repetitive, filled with the dirty work of laundry/diapers/spit up/etc, but the cherry on top of it is the chance to take a nice, deep breath that I haven't had in so long.
What did I do today? Mommying, breathing, and such. The good stuff.
8.15.2016
7.24.2015
Wedding Highlights
June 27, 2015 was one of the most important days of my life. In joining my life together with the man of my dreams, I had the absolute privilege of becoming Mrs. G. Below are some photo highlights of the day. Everything about it was wonderful! Most of all we were overwhelmed by the opportunity to be a reflection to our family and friends of what marriage is, a picture of Christ and His bride, the Church. We are two broken sinners redeemed by Jesus, and we want the world to see how glorious our Savior is!
(All photos taken by Mike Gross of 144 Photos and Traci Gross. Visit www.144photos.com for more details on our awesome photographer and his work!)
(All photos taken by Mike Gross of 144 Photos and Traci Gross. Visit www.144photos.com for more details on our awesome photographer and his work!)
Before the Ceremony
Family
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The Ceremony
The Reception
Some Friends Helped Tell Our Story
Mr. and Mrs. G
The Happy Couple
6.15.2015
A Battle on the Homefront
Although I can't claim to be an individual highly informed on world or national events, I have watched or read enough of the news lately to be troubled. The headlines typically proclaim happenings that are disturbing, alarming, or downright heartbreaking. Like me, you may wonder what the world is coming to, draw closer to loved ones to protect them from the harsh realities, and suit up in armor to leave the house for our daily lives hoping that our contributions will bring light to the darkness. And yet, I have found that there is a war perhaps far more perilous looming at my door from which I cannot escape. I must face the fight at home right on the battlefield of my heart where either sin will reign victorious or a grace more than amazing will conquer all.
Although I grew up in a Christian home, knew about God, and loved Jesus from a young age, it has taken me many bumps, turns, and years into adulthood to truly understand what it means to make Jesus Christ the center of my life and the treasure of my heart. The One who stepped down from his rightful place in heaven, hung on the cross to pay the penalty for my sins, and rose again from the grave to defeat death is not interested in staying on the sidelines of my life giving Him a little piece here or another chunk there when it's convenient or helpful. The heart is a funny thing. We think we can compartmentalize it letting God have most of it and saving a little piece from ourselves. But like an ugly cancer, the sin that is left will run rampant slowly devouring its surroundings. Similarly, to use the words of the apostle Paul, a little leaven leavens the whole lump (Galatians 5:9). The Puritan theologian John Owen also recognized this well and cautioned fellow believers to "be killing sin or sin will be killing you."
If it's a life and death situation, how then should we respond? How can the ugliest of sinners like me ever hope to be victorious? I believe we must first begin by recognizing the hopelessness of the situation. Although it seems counter-intuitive to have an attitude of defeat, the only way we can hope to win the battle of our hearts is by coming to the end of ourselves and seeing ourselves as we truly are. Scripture confirms that we have all failed royally. For all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23). Perhaps you can identify with me as I peer into my own heart and life and see the ugliness and destruction that sin has left in its wake. In 1 Timothy 1:15, Paul claimed to be the foremost of sinners, yet I can't help but feel that Paul had just never met me. Coming to the end of my pride and self-sufficiency in this realization however, I then must cling to the other part of this verse in which Paul says that the saying is trustworthy and deserving of full acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am the foremost. This is where the heart victory can happen! There is simply no way that a broken being such as myself can win the battle, but I have a Captain who has already fought the good fight and claimed victory on my behalf. Through His death and resurrection, Jesus has already made it possible to break the chains of bondage that sin would hope to have over my heart and which steal my joy. I haven't earned this, for it is purely a gift of grace from God, and oh what an amazing grace it truly is. By placing my faith in Jesus Christ and the work he has done on my behalf, my filthy rags are removed and I am dressed in His perfect righteousness. Now by the power of the Holy Spirit, I can now daily take up the battle and fight sin by continually surrendering to Christ and placing Him back on His rightful place in the throne room of my heart.
For as many days as God will grant me to walk on this earth, I must take part in the battle that is not outside my doors but which lies right on the homefront of my heart. What I once was I can confidently claim that I no longer am because my Savior Jesus Christ calls me His. Today I proclaim that by the grace of God I am what I am (1 Corinthians 15:10), a sinner saved by grace alone through faith alone in Christ alone. Reader, would you join me in fighting the fight and claiming a life of joy and beautiful surrender to Christ, the great Victor and King? I pray that you would for the battle rages on. In Him and only Him, there is precious victory!
Although I grew up in a Christian home, knew about God, and loved Jesus from a young age, it has taken me many bumps, turns, and years into adulthood to truly understand what it means to make Jesus Christ the center of my life and the treasure of my heart. The One who stepped down from his rightful place in heaven, hung on the cross to pay the penalty for my sins, and rose again from the grave to defeat death is not interested in staying on the sidelines of my life giving Him a little piece here or another chunk there when it's convenient or helpful. The heart is a funny thing. We think we can compartmentalize it letting God have most of it and saving a little piece from ourselves. But like an ugly cancer, the sin that is left will run rampant slowly devouring its surroundings. Similarly, to use the words of the apostle Paul, a little leaven leavens the whole lump (Galatians 5:9). The Puritan theologian John Owen also recognized this well and cautioned fellow believers to "be killing sin or sin will be killing you."
If it's a life and death situation, how then should we respond? How can the ugliest of sinners like me ever hope to be victorious? I believe we must first begin by recognizing the hopelessness of the situation. Although it seems counter-intuitive to have an attitude of defeat, the only way we can hope to win the battle of our hearts is by coming to the end of ourselves and seeing ourselves as we truly are. Scripture confirms that we have all failed royally. For all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23). Perhaps you can identify with me as I peer into my own heart and life and see the ugliness and destruction that sin has left in its wake. In 1 Timothy 1:15, Paul claimed to be the foremost of sinners, yet I can't help but feel that Paul had just never met me. Coming to the end of my pride and self-sufficiency in this realization however, I then must cling to the other part of this verse in which Paul says that the saying is trustworthy and deserving of full acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am the foremost. This is where the heart victory can happen! There is simply no way that a broken being such as myself can win the battle, but I have a Captain who has already fought the good fight and claimed victory on my behalf. Through His death and resurrection, Jesus has already made it possible to break the chains of bondage that sin would hope to have over my heart and which steal my joy. I haven't earned this, for it is purely a gift of grace from God, and oh what an amazing grace it truly is. By placing my faith in Jesus Christ and the work he has done on my behalf, my filthy rags are removed and I am dressed in His perfect righteousness. Now by the power of the Holy Spirit, I can now daily take up the battle and fight sin by continually surrendering to Christ and placing Him back on His rightful place in the throne room of my heart.
For as many days as God will grant me to walk on this earth, I must take part in the battle that is not outside my doors but which lies right on the homefront of my heart. What I once was I can confidently claim that I no longer am because my Savior Jesus Christ calls me His. Today I proclaim that by the grace of God I am what I am (1 Corinthians 15:10), a sinner saved by grace alone through faith alone in Christ alone. Reader, would you join me in fighting the fight and claiming a life of joy and beautiful surrender to Christ, the great Victor and King? I pray that you would for the battle rages on. In Him and only Him, there is precious victory!
4.19.2014
Facing Our Saturdays
Empty. Lonely. Hopeless. I can only imagine how the day after Jesus' crucifixion felt to His followers. The men and women who had walked with Him, talked with Him, listened to Him, and loved Him were left without Him. Their hopes and dreams of a messiah had been nailed to the cross and laid in a tomb, sealed with a stone as heavy as the weight upon their hearts. The Gospel accounts give us little insight into this Saturday. Of the four, the book of Luke explains that the women who had come with him from Galilee followed and saw the tomb and how his body was laid. Then they returned and prepared spices and ointments. On the Sabbath they rested according to the commandment (Luke 23: 55-56). You don't prepare ointments and spices for the living but for the dead. So all we know is that they rested and waited on that day, but clearly they believed it was over. Oh what a mournful and painful Saturday it must have been.
We too face our Saturdays, those moments when our hopes are crushed and dreams are shattered. A job is lost, a loved one dies, a diagnosis is given, a relationship is broken. In a fallen world, the list goes on and on. What we knew and hoped in is pulled out from under us, and we are left trying to discern left from right, up from down. We wait in it; we hurt in it. We begin to prepare our ointments and spices to try to move forward, to do something in our pain. And yet we often must be patient in the hurt and brokenness, enduring the suffering.
Friday was crushing. Oh how bleak Saturday must have been. Yet take heart for Sunday arrived, and oh how it came!
On the third day, the stone was rolled away. Jesus, the Son of God who had taken our sins upon his shoulders and shamefully hung upon the cross to bear the penalty of our sins, had broken the chains of sin and death forever! When the women went to the tomb, an angel spoke words of great hope to them. Do not be afraid, for I know that you seek Jesus who was crucified. He is not here, for he has risen (Matthew 28:5).
Are you facing a Saturday when hope feels lost and the grip of pain and waiting seems to creep in tighter and closer? Look back to resurrection Sunday and remember that all is not lost but that hope rose for us eternally, for those who place their faith in Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior. Jesus said, In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world (John 16:33). Although the circumstances in life may not be as we'd have them, we can place our trust in the One who holds the world in His hands and Who knows and loves us intimately. In Him is life and joy and peace. He came to give us life and to have it abundantly (John 10:10).
Sunday is coming! We praise you King Jesus. Where we falter and lose hope, we look forward with eager expectation. Our hope is in You, the overcomer of every Friday and Saturday brokenness, the one who has overcome the world!
We too face our Saturdays, those moments when our hopes are crushed and dreams are shattered. A job is lost, a loved one dies, a diagnosis is given, a relationship is broken. In a fallen world, the list goes on and on. What we knew and hoped in is pulled out from under us, and we are left trying to discern left from right, up from down. We wait in it; we hurt in it. We begin to prepare our ointments and spices to try to move forward, to do something in our pain. And yet we often must be patient in the hurt and brokenness, enduring the suffering.
Friday was crushing. Oh how bleak Saturday must have been. Yet take heart for Sunday arrived, and oh how it came!
On the third day, the stone was rolled away. Jesus, the Son of God who had taken our sins upon his shoulders and shamefully hung upon the cross to bear the penalty of our sins, had broken the chains of sin and death forever! When the women went to the tomb, an angel spoke words of great hope to them. Do not be afraid, for I know that you seek Jesus who was crucified. He is not here, for he has risen (Matthew 28:5).
Are you facing a Saturday when hope feels lost and the grip of pain and waiting seems to creep in tighter and closer? Look back to resurrection Sunday and remember that all is not lost but that hope rose for us eternally, for those who place their faith in Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior. Jesus said, In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world (John 16:33). Although the circumstances in life may not be as we'd have them, we can place our trust in the One who holds the world in His hands and Who knows and loves us intimately. In Him is life and joy and peace. He came to give us life and to have it abundantly (John 10:10).
Sunday is coming! We praise you King Jesus. Where we falter and lose hope, we look forward with eager expectation. Our hope is in You, the overcomer of every Friday and Saturday brokenness, the one who has overcome the world!
4.04.2014
Joyful Mourning
The separation of death is a painful blow to our human experience. The sadness felt acutely in our hearts at the loss of those we love bears witness to the fact that death is harsh and not what should be. As death entered my life recently, I found that mourning which pains the heart can also be coupled with beautiful joy.
My grandmother, Jane Elizabeth Beumel, passed away last week. She was an incredibly lovely woman whom I admire deeply. She was sharper and more knowledgeable about most subjects than anyone else I know. She loved hot tea with lots of sugar and always had a spark to her personality. She was adventurous as I aspire to be, for in her younger days she rode the L&N railroad where her father was a conductor to
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travel near and far. She loved my grandfather, Lee, faithfully until his passing and every day after as well. She treasured her family and loved her grandchildren to the hilt. In my childhood, she used to play Barbies with me and let me read aloud to her. Into adulthood, I loved to sit in the rocking chair beside her bed and talk with her or show her stylish new outfits I'd picked out for special occasions. I always knew that she was incredibly proud of the woman I had grown to be and that her love would never fail.
Undoubtedly, her passing leaves a hole that aches and grieves. Yet in this sadness, there is yet another quality about my grandmother and her life which has turned the sorrow into gladness and celebration. My grandmother was a woman of faith who had placed her faith in her Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. This makes all the difference.
Death is the result and penalty of our sin and fallen nature. Just as the first human beings, Adam and Eve, willfully chose disobedience, so too do each of us. For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God. (Romans 3:23). I acknowledge and absolutely admit this about myself. Yet even in this state, God made a way for us to be made in right relationship with him again just as man was first created to be. But God shows His love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us (Romans 5:8). Through His death on the cross, Jesus took my sins upon his shoulders and absorbed the punishment and death that I deserve. Not only did He die in my stead, but He also defeated death and rose again by the power of the Spirit! So while nothing of my own, no matter how good it may be, can ever earn God's favor or clear our record of sin, there is One who can if you call upon His Name and place your trust in Him. Jesus Christ, fully God Who became fully man, lived perfectly, died, and rose again so that in Him, I might have this credited to me. We were buried therefore with him by baptism into death, in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might walk in newness of life (Romans 6:4). So while death is still a reality here on this earth, it is not the end but just the beginning. For those who have placed their trust in Christ, our lives can be made new even today, and we will one day be made perfect in Him and enjoy His presence for eternity. Equally real, those who have turned from God and refused His Son will not have His righteousness to stand upon. They will deserve the separation and judgment that sin demands. His salvation is open to everyone who would call on His Name. There is no one too far gone or too low for the depths of His love, not even you or me. If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved (Romans 10:9).
I experienced joyful mourning in saying goodbye to Maw Maw Jane. I mourn for the loss of a woman I dearly love, but I rejoice with a full heart that Jesus has taken her home to be with Him. I am joyous that she gets to experience the fullness of His glory and to worship Him with adoration and awe. I am excited that one day I will get to join her and the multitude of believers in this! So as Easter Sunday approaches in a few weeks, I reflect upon the Friday death of my Jesus and that Sunday joyful morning of His resurrection that allows my joyful mourning! Praise be to His name always!
My grandmother, Jane Elizabeth Beumel, passed away last week. She was an incredibly lovely woman whom I admire deeply. She was sharper and more knowledgeable about most subjects than anyone else I know. She loved hot tea with lots of sugar and always had a spark to her personality. She was adventurous as I aspire to be, for in her younger days she rode the L&N railroad where her father was a conductor to
Undoubtedly, her passing leaves a hole that aches and grieves. Yet in this sadness, there is yet another quality about my grandmother and her life which has turned the sorrow into gladness and celebration. My grandmother was a woman of faith who had placed her faith in her Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. This makes all the difference.
Death is the result and penalty of our sin and fallen nature. Just as the first human beings, Adam and Eve, willfully chose disobedience, so too do each of us. For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God. (Romans 3:23). I acknowledge and absolutely admit this about myself. Yet even in this state, God made a way for us to be made in right relationship with him again just as man was first created to be. But God shows His love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us (Romans 5:8). Through His death on the cross, Jesus took my sins upon his shoulders and absorbed the punishment and death that I deserve. Not only did He die in my stead, but He also defeated death and rose again by the power of the Spirit! So while nothing of my own, no matter how good it may be, can ever earn God's favor or clear our record of sin, there is One who can if you call upon His Name and place your trust in Him. Jesus Christ, fully God Who became fully man, lived perfectly, died, and rose again so that in Him, I might have this credited to me. We were buried therefore with him by baptism into death, in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might walk in newness of life (Romans 6:4). So while death is still a reality here on this earth, it is not the end but just the beginning. For those who have placed their trust in Christ, our lives can be made new even today, and we will one day be made perfect in Him and enjoy His presence for eternity. Equally real, those who have turned from God and refused His Son will not have His righteousness to stand upon. They will deserve the separation and judgment that sin demands. His salvation is open to everyone who would call on His Name. There is no one too far gone or too low for the depths of His love, not even you or me. If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved (Romans 10:9).
I experienced joyful mourning in saying goodbye to Maw Maw Jane. I mourn for the loss of a woman I dearly love, but I rejoice with a full heart that Jesus has taken her home to be with Him. I am joyous that she gets to experience the fullness of His glory and to worship Him with adoration and awe. I am excited that one day I will get to join her and the multitude of believers in this! So as Easter Sunday approaches in a few weeks, I reflect upon the Friday death of my Jesus and that Sunday joyful morning of His resurrection that allows my joyful mourning! Praise be to His name always!
From life's first cry to final breath.
Jesus commands my destiny.
No power of hell, no scheme of man,
Can ever pluck me from His hand;
Till He returns or calls me home,
Here in the power of Christ I'll stand.
Jesus commands my destiny.
No power of hell, no scheme of man,
Can ever pluck me from His hand;
Till He returns or calls me home,
Here in the power of Christ I'll stand.
-"In Christ Alone"
1.11.2014
Silence Is Golden
People tend to think I'm a pretty quiet person, and I get it. Don't get me wrong, I love to talk, but I often live in a world of thoughts rather than busting out to share my opinions and words with the world. Yet even with introverted tendencies, there are many times when I feel like duct tape over my mouth is needed. Too often the words that I do speak are ones that I wish I could take back, words of complaint rather than praise, words of anger rather than love, or words of negativity rather than encouragement. Now and then I think of a lesson that my friend's dad shared with us during our childhood. Squeezing a small tube of toothpaste out on a paper plate, he pointed that it could not be retracted into the bottle. In this same manner, words once spoken cannot be taken back. Forgiven, yes, but they will have left their mark nonetheless.
The wisdom of Solomon teaches similarly in Proverbs. When words are many, transgression is not lacking, but whoever restrains his lips is prudent (Proverbs 10: 19). Thoughts so easily become words spilled among our families, friends, coworkers, neighbors, and even strangers. Words carelessly and selfishly spoken can be an arrow of pain to those we love the most. Even worse, in this we fail to emanate to those around us the love which we have received through Christ. Words carelessly spoken should strike our own hearts deeply as well for they don't honor ourselves, others, or the Lord. As I often repeat to my students the words of Thumper from the Disney movie Bambi, "If you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all." If many words invite transgression, I can only conclude that the cliche rings true: silence is golden. Thankfully, though, I believe that golden silence can move us to an attitude and position in which our words can build up others and honor God.
Having an appropriate view of God is important I believe in regards to this issue. First of all, it is important to note that those in Christ can approach the throne of grace with confidence because of the work Jesus has done on my behalf (Hebrews 4:16). He is my Mediator and Advocate making it possible for me to approach an infinitely holy God. And yet, I desire to always be awed at the grandness and magnificence of my God and never flippant in my posture toward Him. The Creator of the dust beneath my feet, the very cells in my body, the stars in the sky, and the unknown reaches of the solar system is my God. Let me be quiet and awed before His throne. But the Lord is in his holy temple; let all the earth keep silence before him (Habakkuk 2:20). Be still, and know that I am God...(Psalm 46:10). The triune God: the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, are eternally perfect while I am but a wisp of breath. Having this correct understanding and reverence before Him leads me to golden silence, a quiet which allows me to bask in His royal perfection and love which the Father has given to me through the sacrifice of His Son and the gift of His Spirit.
Somewhat ironically, as I meditate upon how great and majestic our God is, I can't keep silent! I'm like a geyser bubbling up with thankfulness and joy that He would choose to save a sinner such as me, become Lord of my life, and bring a completeness to my life that this world could never satisfy. This praise cannot lead to sinful words of anger, bitterness, or complaining but finally brings me to a place where my communication first honors God and radiates His love to others. My mouth will speak the praise of the Lord...(Psalm 146:21). We become free and able to encourage one another and build one another up (1 Thessalonians 5:11).
May my mouth be closed when words are many and lead to destruction. May my heart and mind be turned in golden silence to my Lord. And may the renewed and vibrant words that spill forth in praise speak well of His greatness and place His glory on display for all to see!
The wisdom of Solomon teaches similarly in Proverbs. When words are many, transgression is not lacking, but whoever restrains his lips is prudent (Proverbs 10: 19). Thoughts so easily become words spilled among our families, friends, coworkers, neighbors, and even strangers. Words carelessly and selfishly spoken can be an arrow of pain to those we love the most. Even worse, in this we fail to emanate to those around us the love which we have received through Christ. Words carelessly spoken should strike our own hearts deeply as well for they don't honor ourselves, others, or the Lord. As I often repeat to my students the words of Thumper from the Disney movie Bambi, "If you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all." If many words invite transgression, I can only conclude that the cliche rings true: silence is golden. Thankfully, though, I believe that golden silence can move us to an attitude and position in which our words can build up others and honor God.
Having an appropriate view of God is important I believe in regards to this issue. First of all, it is important to note that those in Christ can approach the throne of grace with confidence because of the work Jesus has done on my behalf (Hebrews 4:16). He is my Mediator and Advocate making it possible for me to approach an infinitely holy God. And yet, I desire to always be awed at the grandness and magnificence of my God and never flippant in my posture toward Him. The Creator of the dust beneath my feet, the very cells in my body, the stars in the sky, and the unknown reaches of the solar system is my God. Let me be quiet and awed before His throne. But the Lord is in his holy temple; let all the earth keep silence before him (Habakkuk 2:20). Be still, and know that I am God...(Psalm 46:10). The triune God: the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, are eternally perfect while I am but a wisp of breath. Having this correct understanding and reverence before Him leads me to golden silence, a quiet which allows me to bask in His royal perfection and love which the Father has given to me through the sacrifice of His Son and the gift of His Spirit.
Somewhat ironically, as I meditate upon how great and majestic our God is, I can't keep silent! I'm like a geyser bubbling up with thankfulness and joy that He would choose to save a sinner such as me, become Lord of my life, and bring a completeness to my life that this world could never satisfy. This praise cannot lead to sinful words of anger, bitterness, or complaining but finally brings me to a place where my communication first honors God and radiates His love to others. My mouth will speak the praise of the Lord...(Psalm 146:21). We become free and able to encourage one another and build one another up (1 Thessalonians 5:11).
May my mouth be closed when words are many and lead to destruction. May my heart and mind be turned in golden silence to my Lord. And may the renewed and vibrant words that spill forth in praise speak well of His greatness and place His glory on display for all to see!
12.31.2013
Why Resolutions Are Great (And Also Ineffective...)
2013, it's time to bid thee farewell. You've been a great one. In fact, I'd have to say one of the very best. During your twelve months, your 365 days, God has worked on my mind, heart, and life in ways that I never could have hoped for or fathomed. 2013, you were a year of truth and grace, life giving truth that made me realize just how much grace I need from myself, others, and which I'm given abundantly day after day by the Lord. I can only hope that the year to come will bring much more of the same.
Being the goal-oriented planner that I am, another year heralds an opportunity to make new resolutions and reach for greater heights. Books to read, Scripture to study, thoughts to journal, posts to write, moments to be thankful, and people to love (like the verb and not just the word); these are all on docket for 2014. I'm pretty excited about it, and I'll probably tell you more about it as the year rolls by. Clearly, I think resolutions and goals are great.....and I also think that they are ultimately ineffective. Before you call me confused and speaking nonsense, let me explain.
Why do we make resolutions?
We as human beings realize that we just simply aren't reaching our full potential. We want to be the best version, to prove to ourselves and those around us that we are valuable and worthy of time and attention. We believe we must earn it.
Why aren't resolutions good enough?
If I achieved infinite goals, lofty ones that took me to the highest mountain peaks or to the greatest extreme, I'm certain I'd find what I already know in my life. It's not good enough. It's never enough because there is always another step up, more to prove or achieve. Rather than reach the finish line and think, "I made it! Now I can just be.", we realize with disappointment that we're still flawed and in need of improvement. It seems that achievements no matter how great are always overshadowed by the realization that there is much brokenness and failure in our lives. It can become an exhausting and self-deprecating cycle.
Fear not. There's good news.
What's the alternative?
You're with me aren't you? If we're both being real with ourselves, I know you're with me on this one because you're a flawed human being just like I am. Now that we've broken down the facade and gotten real about the fact that resolutions and self fixes will never actually fix us, let's consider an alternative. In 2013, I've come to love even more something that I've known and embraced for a long time. Yes, God was really gracious to move it deeper into the intimate recesses of my heart and let me bask in it at a grander level: I'm not good enough, yet He has sent one Who is infinitely good enough so that I can be made perfect in Him. I can say that I make big mistakes and little mistakes and miss the mark for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23). I acknowledge my weakness so that I can see my need. Because of my sinfulness, God the Father sent His Son, Jesus Christ, to live a sinless life and to die on my behalf absorbing the wrath and punishment that I rightly deserved, for He loves me so (John 3:16). By placing my faith and life in Christ, I get the beautiful gift of union with Him. When God looks at me, He sees Jesus' perfection. It's unreal how amazing it is, but it is real! Thank you God that you are a God of truth and a God of great grace.
Why make resolutions?
So clearly I don't have to flounder in the fact that I'm not enough anymore. Jesus is mine, and I am His. My position as perfect in Christ is secure. However, this doesn't mean it's always apparent in my everyday life. With God residing within me in the person of the Holy Spirit, He is now working together with me throughout life to become more like Christ in practice. And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ (Philippians 1:6). Because of my thankfulness for His saving work, I'm going to take action in obedience to please Him. This doesn't earn me my salvation or make Him love me more. But an overflowing fountain from a grateful heart can't help but want to show it through action.
2014, you will be a year of more changes and goals so get ready. In 365 days, I hope I look more like Jesus than I do today. I will remember that resolutions are ineffective of themselves, but in context and paired with the perfection of my Savior, I can move forward in obedience, truth, and grace to love my God and those He has placed around me with greater intensity and completeness.
Truth. Grace. Jesus.
Happy New Year!
Being the goal-oriented planner that I am, another year heralds an opportunity to make new resolutions and reach for greater heights. Books to read, Scripture to study, thoughts to journal, posts to write, moments to be thankful, and people to love (like the verb and not just the word); these are all on docket for 2014. I'm pretty excited about it, and I'll probably tell you more about it as the year rolls by. Clearly, I think resolutions and goals are great.....and I also think that they are ultimately ineffective. Before you call me confused and speaking nonsense, let me explain.
Why do we make resolutions?
We as human beings realize that we just simply aren't reaching our full potential. We want to be the best version, to prove to ourselves and those around us that we are valuable and worthy of time and attention. We believe we must earn it.
Why aren't resolutions good enough?
If I achieved infinite goals, lofty ones that took me to the highest mountain peaks or to the greatest extreme, I'm certain I'd find what I already know in my life. It's not good enough. It's never enough because there is always another step up, more to prove or achieve. Rather than reach the finish line and think, "I made it! Now I can just be.", we realize with disappointment that we're still flawed and in need of improvement. It seems that achievements no matter how great are always overshadowed by the realization that there is much brokenness and failure in our lives. It can become an exhausting and self-deprecating cycle.
Fear not. There's good news.
What's the alternative?
You're with me aren't you? If we're both being real with ourselves, I know you're with me on this one because you're a flawed human being just like I am. Now that we've broken down the facade and gotten real about the fact that resolutions and self fixes will never actually fix us, let's consider an alternative. In 2013, I've come to love even more something that I've known and embraced for a long time. Yes, God was really gracious to move it deeper into the intimate recesses of my heart and let me bask in it at a grander level: I'm not good enough, yet He has sent one Who is infinitely good enough so that I can be made perfect in Him. I can say that I make big mistakes and little mistakes and miss the mark for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23). I acknowledge my weakness so that I can see my need. Because of my sinfulness, God the Father sent His Son, Jesus Christ, to live a sinless life and to die on my behalf absorbing the wrath and punishment that I rightly deserved, for He loves me so (John 3:16). By placing my faith and life in Christ, I get the beautiful gift of union with Him. When God looks at me, He sees Jesus' perfection. It's unreal how amazing it is, but it is real! Thank you God that you are a God of truth and a God of great grace.
Why make resolutions?
So clearly I don't have to flounder in the fact that I'm not enough anymore. Jesus is mine, and I am His. My position as perfect in Christ is secure. However, this doesn't mean it's always apparent in my everyday life. With God residing within me in the person of the Holy Spirit, He is now working together with me throughout life to become more like Christ in practice. And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ (Philippians 1:6). Because of my thankfulness for His saving work, I'm going to take action in obedience to please Him. This doesn't earn me my salvation or make Him love me more. But an overflowing fountain from a grateful heart can't help but want to show it through action.
2014, you will be a year of more changes and goals so get ready. In 365 days, I hope I look more like Jesus than I do today. I will remember that resolutions are ineffective of themselves, but in context and paired with the perfection of my Savior, I can move forward in obedience, truth, and grace to love my God and those He has placed around me with greater intensity and completeness.
Truth. Grace. Jesus.
Happy New Year!
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