N is for...

     is for needy.



It's much past my bedtime, yet I can't go to sleep.  I'm not sure if it was the half hour nap I took late this afternoon or the espresso covered gelato I enjoyed for dessert at my favorite restaurant.  Probably a combination of the two not so wise choices, so here I am writing and hoping that I will soon drift off into dreamland. 

I was thinking about my word for the letter "n".  I've chosen the word needy because it's something that I'm realizing I need to embrace.  Over the past few years, I have found such empowerment in being self-sufficient.  I have a job I love, I have many friendships and activities to fill my time, I have a wonderful church, and I have goals that I'm working on such as attaining my master's degree or training for mini marathons.  I'm proud that I'm becoming the woman that I wanted to be as a young girl, yet I must acknowledge that this self-reliance isn't completely all that it's cracked up to be.  You see, this has another side to it, a very ugly side.  When God is blessing me in these areas of life and allowing me to succeed, I often forget to give Him the glory for it.  Sadly (and very honestly), I also often become more focused on me and less focused on Him. 

I recently began attending a different church and got connected through a young adult Bible study group.  I've been so encouraged by these godly men and women who are seeking to grow in God and to live lives pleasing to Him.  It challenges me to slow down, to prioritize, to fellowship, and to become more of a Christ-centered woman instead of a self-centered being.  I find that as I focus more clearly on Him, I realize how truly needy I am.  When I let Him fill me, I thirst for more.  I want to feel needy for Jesus, to be humbled and aware that I am nothing without Him.  In Christ, I can stand tall and be a woman of God who does good things for Him.  May my pride be squelched when it arises, may I be needy rather than self-reliant, and may I continually desire more and more of my Savior.     

M is for...

is for knowing you matter.


Tomorrow is Valentine's Day, and I have to throw it out there that it's one of my least favorite holidays.  Guys, I know you all hear me on that one.  Seriously though ladies, isn't it just a recipe for disaster?  I'll blame it on Disney princesses and The Notebook, but by golly I really want someone to go all out.  Go ahead and write me a year's worth of letters.  I won't be mad.  In all seriousness, though, these girly wishes quite frankly just aren't very realistic or a fair expectation all in all.

Love this.  (Source: someecards.com)

 

I feel like it's a bit sad that we have to set a day aside each year to let people know how much we care.  I want the people in my life who I love to know how much they matter to me each and every day that we get to live this beautiful life.  I want to talk to them, spend time with them, work with them, and play with them.  I want to make them laugh and let them cry.  I want to be honest and absolutely not perfect and will expect the same from them.  When Valentine's Day rolls around, I guess the commercialized aspect of it just doesn't mean that much.  I think my expectation, though, is a much greater thing.  I think we owe it to each other to go out of our way all year round to let one another know how much we matter and make the lives of others brighter.  It's not always easy, it's not always convenient, but I'm convinced that it's always worth it.  

This February 14, spread the love.  I just hope we let it roll on over into all the other 364 days this year too!  Because you and others matter.